Chris (mojonixon) wrote,
Chris
mojonixon

bah

Thanksgiving break is such a tease. Thursday I didn't really do anything except stay home and eat turkey while the family came over. I'm not one to socialize with them. I mean, they're cool and all, but there is a big generation gap between myself and my oldest cousins. It's too weird trying to engage in some kind of conversation with them. Instead of doing so, I stayed in my room nearly the entire day reading research journals on the hippocampus and working on my SI session plans. Yay fun.

Friday proved to be as eventful as the previous day. Only this time, I actually went to the movies with my younger cousins (on my dad's side). Being that one of them is 12, we had to settle for something gay and stupid. You guessed it, Harry Potter! I still don't understand why this franchise is so popular. It reminds of that crappy song Who Let the Dogs Out, only it's a lot easier to tune out thank God.

So that brings me to today. I've been studying for my physics lab final on monday. I'm really glad school will be ending soon. I'm so tired of it. I'm tired of studying so damn much and not having a social life. The other day in the SI office, everyone was telling me that if I applied myself I could actually have a decent social life (and by social life I essentially mean luck with the opposite sex). I see what they're saying. For one, my assets aren't horrible. I mean, I'm not an fugly slut or anything. I may not be the brighest person in the world, but I'd say I have an above-average IQ. So what's the problem? As I've mentioned countless times, it just seems that most girls are looking for more than what I have to offer. A nerd who stays in his room on the weekends reading science journals isn't exactly alluring to most women. I don't have a choice though. My research job requires heavy reading. I'm going to take the MCAT next august. I need to keep my GPA high. To me, it feels like losing time for any of those things will screw me in the long run. I know everything can't be perfect, but it sure feels like it has to be for me to have a good future.

Anyway--I guess in the midst of my rambling the point I'm trying to make is that I'm very lonely and school sucks. Unless I find somebody who understands what I'm going through, then I guess things will stay that way. god damnit.
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